Friday, January 23, 2004
day 1185 - "...and I used to sell drugs"
So i'm like so fucking frustrated at work. The two people on either side of me make half the calls and sell twice as much. I was like, "I don't get it." Then it hit me, L. has been in sales for years, and R. has been in corporate america for a long ass time as well. No shit they're ahead of me, they realy do know what they're doing. I on the other hand used to sell drugs. What the hell do I know about corporations and that other good shit. Peace.
Thursday, January 22, 2004
day 1184 - problem + solution
problem = howard
solution = God
any questions?
solution = God
any questions?
Wednesday, January 21, 2004
Day 1183 - just another day
just another day. wen to the gym this morning, all planned out to shower there and leave for work. Worked out great, saved an ass load of time. will do again. also should try to go to a meeting today at like 5 or 5:30. would be good for me I'm sure. Got a ride the pony now that I found it. peace.
Tuesday, January 20, 2004
Day 1182 -- Repetition becomes Habbit
Went to the Gym, great work out, just legs. 6:20 am, asking God to challenge me today. Put me in an environment where I can grow and change to become more like who he would have me be today. I have not surrendered out of virtue but of desparation. I am not lonely or disconnected, yet I would say somewhat blocked. And God's energy would be a welcome presense to course through my entire being. I know this means I must yeild to selflessness, that it is in my egocentric living that I have placed a barier between the Greatness and my soul. If the Infinite shal live in me and through me it is only through willingness to "self-forget" that I will be placed in such a position. Willing I am. Live, Love, Learn. Peace out. -HJS
Monday, January 19, 2004
Day 1181 -- Been a while
I'm glad these blogs are free. I haven't written in a while and it would piss me off to have been paying money for something I'm not using. Anyway, glad to be back. Still single, a bit lonely but not too bad. Things really are going well. Some friends and I started a Steel on Steel group last night. If you're not familiar with the format let me know and I'll email it to you. It's a really good thing. I've also picked up the disgusting habit of praying on my knees. It's really revolting but it seems to be helping so I'll keep doing it. Also God is not responsible for me not having a girlfriend. It's my own lack of character. Things like confidence and self esteem. So I've been praying for God to help me in those areas, to make me attract women instead of God intervening in another's free will. We'll see how this works out. Also, I'm moving into a house with some sober guys. Looks like some new adventures and what not for me. Anyway, love you, hope you come back and visit soon. Have a great day.
-H.
-H.
